I really prefer acryllic.

I've been hearing about the special bug-bear of the proprietress of a ladies' clothing shop in town. Once a month for 14 years, regular as clock-work, she has been visited by a woman, size 22, who goes through all the tops on the rails carefully, slowly, then tries on anything that might, at a stretch, fit. To the detriment of the stock. She then says, pulling her own top back on with a sigh: 'Really I prefer these acryllic ones you know.'

She has never, in all these years, bought a single garment from the shop.