The medical profession.

OT here but as I am feeling ill today and forced to 'go to the doctor' it's topical even if nothing about bookshops or books. I get paranoid about the whole National Health 'service' which gets more and more Fascist in nature. Recently I have had three letters and a phone message summoning me to the asthma clinic and the BP clinic. The asthma clinic I really don't want to go to anyway because: a) The asthma is under control; b) I DO know how to use the damn inhaler - should do after thirty odd years using them; c) the nurse in charge said to my friend Kate: 'Oh we've got you here at last! Do you realise people DIE of asthma?' Helpful. Obviously the nurse herself had never had an asthma attack. if she had had she would have noticed that lack of oxygen does tend to make one fear for ones life. The insistence of the letters unfortunately also makes me feel stubborn about having my blood pressure checked. I am a head-in-the-sand sort of person and intend to stay that way. They have enough hypochondriacs to keep them busy I'm sure.

BP was high this morning because I have a virus and was anyway worked up about having to set foot in the place. I went armed with a letter giving my reasons why I wasn't attending the clinics. Bit wasted really. I could have explained to this doctor who was of the listening variety and gave me an exclusion note on my records. Rare bird. She did take the time to explain that they are obliged by the powers hat be to fulfil their quotas of pro-active patient care. If they don't t they don't get paid. happily she thinks they can fulfil them without me.

In truth it isn't the doctors I fear but the nurses whose lesser status in the profession makes some of them determined to wield what power they do have to maximum effect. I don't like the looks they exchange when taking my BP. Those looks say: 'Look at this Eth. Did you ever see one so high? She's not going to last the day!.' OK OK I know I exagerate and no-one is called Eth these days, but that's the conversation behind those glances. Also it is more often nurses who go in for killing off the patients than the doctors, though Shipman rather spoilt the record.

I went to the flu vaccination cattle market one year and was giving my name, rank and number when a nurse said cuttingly: 'That's alright then. We know who YOU are.'

Paranoia trip. Train leaving at this station.