Genetics

In less than three weeks the gull chicks on the roof opposite my bedroom skylight have turned from fluffballs on cocktail sticks to the compressed grey matter from my Dyson on stilts. I have tried to get a photograph of them but when I open the skylight far enough to put my head out, or at least the camera, to get a clear view the adults react like the birds in the tops of the trees when Alice grew huge. Anyone within a mile radius can hear them yelling 'Serpent!' No-one would be interested in my ornithological observations except me anyway as gulls are considered a nuisance in the town, but I've watched the parents snuggling up to each other long before any eggs were laid, exchanging what look like tender jabs of the beak occasionally, and since the eggs hatched I have seen what caring parents they are, deterring the adventurous one from standing on the edge of the flat part around the chimney when it was still wobbly on its feet, falling onto its beak every other step.

Seeing such rapid growth and watching too many X-Files gave me the uncomfortable notion of a DNA on-off switch gone wrong. We could have gulls the size of Nimrods nesting by our chimneys.

DNA and hormones. So vital and so strong - and so fragile. I am thinking now of Mr Toad, on the run. He will always be on the run, if not from the police then from himself and the disastrous life he creates for himself, constantly living in some vision of future projects and loves; congenitally incapable of being satisfied with his present situation, however much promise that might hold. It is never enough. He has to reach beyond what is physicaly available to him in money or in attention. Situations get boring. People get boring, not bringing enough challenge, or enough glory. Nothing can give him what he searches for. It's difficult not to feel sorry for him. How much of that complex, arrogant warped mind is DNA and how much a chemical imbalance? He can't find a place to rest or be at peace.

Then I remember that I know others on lithium because they are bi-polar and the condition has never caused them to be amoral. They know right from wrong. They know when they are culpable of crossing the boundaries between acceptable and unacceptable behaviour. They don't use people ruthlessly to get what they want.

Then my sympathy drains away..